I find I have become quite, quite transfixed by these shoes just listed on eBay. They sort of look like they should be hideous. In the wrong hands they would have been hideous. But they’re not hideous. They’re beautiful. They’re green, they’re silk, they’re diamante.

Rayne shoes were of a very high quality, being shoemakers to the Queen and all that. Mr Rayne also made the shoes Diana Rigg wore in The Avengers. So you know you’re getting something good with Rayne.

They’re also about a size too small for Miss Muggins here, but please someone with 5½ feet buy them. I can’t promise you won’t be so transfixed that you’ll find yourself staring down at them all the time and keep bumping into people, but it’s probably a price worth paying.

Coooooo, Mavis, ain’t they gawgeous!